I am so glad it's vacation. I am calling for a moment of silence here to celebrate:
------------------
No but really this is awesome. I have been off school for about a week now, and not much has happened since then. Hung out with some friends, watched a whole lot of movies, ate a hamburger...
Most of my friends have split for wherever in the world they call home, their next vacation destination. And today I realized that for the past month or more I have been absolutely surrounded, almost 24 hours a day, with friends. Between the Flagship office, hanging out at Craft Beer, and meeting up with people for meals, this entire semester has just been constant face time with my awesome awesome classmates. I think that today was the most time I have spent on my own in weeks, and it's only been like 20 hours.
It's coming as sort of a shock to me. I used to spend all sorts of time on my own. I would just like walk around and go places and study and eat, just all on my own, for like days. I never found it strange until today, when suddenly my usual pals have left, and my life has swung back to its polar opposite. Its like this recent past has put the farther past into better perspective, but all that does is leaves me here in the present, wishing for either my friends back by my side or the independence that I used to be able enjoy.
This is a good thing though. It's time for everyone to go and take care of themselves, take a break. That's true for me, for sure. My apartment is a filthy mess, I'm moving out in the middle of February, and I've got a half-read novel that needs my attention. I'm melancholy, but I get it. And I cannot wait for the next time that we can all be reunited--that goes to everyone: my classmates, my family, and friends back home. Now that it's vacation and I'm without a set schedule, I am feeling more deeply the fact that time stretches on for a long long time, and that we really do have a lot of time, and I have faith that during my personal little slice of eternity, we will meet again, and it will be wonderful.
But for now, I'll be missing you, yes, I do mean you, my dear friend. Thanks for reading, peace and love ~
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
The coldest shower of all
So i'm going to tell you the story of the worst shower ever, which involves three funny and unrelated occurrences, and goes like this:
Most showers here have little tiny gas powered water heaters, not so much different that the water heaters in the states, save for the fact that these are like 1/5 the size, much smaller. Another funny thing about most showers here is that they all seem to include heat lamps, so that when you turn the shower off, you aren't freezing cold. Great idea! It really does help. But in my case, they heat lamp seems to run the same circuit as the electric fan, so if the ceiling fan isn't running, you can't use the heat lamp. And the last and final thing about showering is that in order to have a clean dry towel, you must launder and dry it (duh), except there are no electric clothes dryers here, and all your stuff must be hang-dryed. Some drying are inside, and some including mine are outside.
Now, these things are all part of a normal bathroom/shower situation, but recently all of these things seemed to take a turn for the worse, turning my shower into the worst shower ever. First, I like to take pretty hot showers, especially when it is cold outside; the problem is that it makes the hot water run out in just a few minutes, we're talking like 8 minutes if you're lucky. On top of that, the electric ceiling fan broke: no more heat lamp! Lastly, on one particularly windy day, I forgot to place a clip on the drying wrack to hold my towel in place. To my dismay, the next time I went to go look for my towel, it was hanging off the edge of someone else's drying rack two stories below me.
So cut to me, on a particularly cold night running to hot water up on high in the shower, conditioner in my hair, and suddenly the hot water just totally runs out, and there is no heat lamp or towel. I was SO unhappy, it was a pretty comical moment. It was so inconvenient, it was almost like I had never even considered how wonderful instant hot water is back in the states. Obviously I just bit the bullet and finished up, but it sucked! haha SO anyways, all my people who are stateside, go enjoy a hot shower and run your electric clothes dryer, and think of me and how jealous I am ;)
Most showers here have little tiny gas powered water heaters, not so much different that the water heaters in the states, save for the fact that these are like 1/5 the size, much smaller. Another funny thing about most showers here is that they all seem to include heat lamps, so that when you turn the shower off, you aren't freezing cold. Great idea! It really does help. But in my case, they heat lamp seems to run the same circuit as the electric fan, so if the ceiling fan isn't running, you can't use the heat lamp. And the last and final thing about showering is that in order to have a clean dry towel, you must launder and dry it (duh), except there are no electric clothes dryers here, and all your stuff must be hang-dryed. Some drying are inside, and some including mine are outside.
Now, these things are all part of a normal bathroom/shower situation, but recently all of these things seemed to take a turn for the worse, turning my shower into the worst shower ever. First, I like to take pretty hot showers, especially when it is cold outside; the problem is that it makes the hot water run out in just a few minutes, we're talking like 8 minutes if you're lucky. On top of that, the electric ceiling fan broke: no more heat lamp! Lastly, on one particularly windy day, I forgot to place a clip on the drying wrack to hold my towel in place. To my dismay, the next time I went to go look for my towel, it was hanging off the edge of someone else's drying rack two stories below me.
So cut to me, on a particularly cold night running to hot water up on high in the shower, conditioner in my hair, and suddenly the hot water just totally runs out, and there is no heat lamp or towel. I was SO unhappy, it was a pretty comical moment. It was so inconvenient, it was almost like I had never even considered how wonderful instant hot water is back in the states. Obviously I just bit the bullet and finished up, but it sucked! haha SO anyways, all my people who are stateside, go enjoy a hot shower and run your electric clothes dryer, and think of me and how jealous I am ;)
Monday, December 23, 2013
Gym Rat Girl
Greetings all! 好久不见！Its been a while since my last post. Swamped. Again. I don't need to go into it.
Been back at the gym lately! Going to the gym just makes me feel so much better: more relaxed, stronger, makes me sleep better, and on and on. I feel alright if I don't go, but I just feel awesome when I start going again, I wonder why I ever stopped! So there is a university gym here for students. 8 kuai to use the treadmill for a half hour and weights! Good deal.
But really, there was a good reason why I didn't keep up at the gym since I arrived in Nanjing. I figured that, like in the United States, the gym would be mostly full of dudes working out. In the US I can handle being the only girl in the gym, or usually there is at least one other female person. But over here, it is a little different. It is very clear than when I lift weights, I look really really odd. People take long, undisguised looks, and not going to lie, it is really uncomfortable. I even got my picture taken the other day, and no, they did not ask my permission first.
Being here, just doing what I always do, I can feel the differences between peoples' reaction to me. Going to the gym is one of my things, and one of the differences is that people just think it is really weird for me to want to work out. China doesn't really emphasize physical education as something worth pursuing. Sometimes I see people walking around who clearly have never done any physical exercise. People with no muscles. No butt whatsoever. Arms that aren't used to lifting more than a finger. Awkward, uncoordinated running strides. So when I arrive at the gym in my work out clothes and have a good run and do squats and lift weights, I just stick out like a sore thumb.
I feel like another aspect to my awkwardness has to do with my female-ness. Sexism is still alive and kicking here. I feel its presence in odd and subtle ways once in a while, and I get that feeling when I go to the gym. There seems to be so many reasons why someone would stare at me or take my picture that it would be difficult to say definitively why it occurs or attribute it to any one reason, but I feel like the female thing is definitely playing a role here. I feel almost subversive when I show up and pick up a set of weights.
Though its terribly awkward, I will keep going to the gym. I will keep showing up there doing what I always do, because I know there is nothing wrong with me working out, or wearing cute work out clothes, or lifting weights. I actually kind of like the idea that I can make people uncomfortable, because it means that they're going to have to reflect what is is that is making them uncomfortable, and why, maybe. As long as I can take the heat first. Because really, it is really weird.
Been back at the gym lately! Going to the gym just makes me feel so much better: more relaxed, stronger, makes me sleep better, and on and on. I feel alright if I don't go, but I just feel awesome when I start going again, I wonder why I ever stopped! So there is a university gym here for students. 8 kuai to use the treadmill for a half hour and weights! Good deal.
But really, there was a good reason why I didn't keep up at the gym since I arrived in Nanjing. I figured that, like in the United States, the gym would be mostly full of dudes working out. In the US I can handle being the only girl in the gym, or usually there is at least one other female person. But over here, it is a little different. It is very clear than when I lift weights, I look really really odd. People take long, undisguised looks, and not going to lie, it is really uncomfortable. I even got my picture taken the other day, and no, they did not ask my permission first.
Being here, just doing what I always do, I can feel the differences between peoples' reaction to me. Going to the gym is one of my things, and one of the differences is that people just think it is really weird for me to want to work out. China doesn't really emphasize physical education as something worth pursuing. Sometimes I see people walking around who clearly have never done any physical exercise. People with no muscles. No butt whatsoever. Arms that aren't used to lifting more than a finger. Awkward, uncoordinated running strides. So when I arrive at the gym in my work out clothes and have a good run and do squats and lift weights, I just stick out like a sore thumb.
I feel like another aspect to my awkwardness has to do with my female-ness. Sexism is still alive and kicking here. I feel its presence in odd and subtle ways once in a while, and I get that feeling when I go to the gym. There seems to be so many reasons why someone would stare at me or take my picture that it would be difficult to say definitively why it occurs or attribute it to any one reason, but I feel like the female thing is definitely playing a role here. I feel almost subversive when I show up and pick up a set of weights.
Though its terribly awkward, I will keep going to the gym. I will keep showing up there doing what I always do, because I know there is nothing wrong with me working out, or wearing cute work out clothes, or lifting weights. I actually kind of like the idea that I can make people uncomfortable, because it means that they're going to have to reflect what is is that is making them uncomfortable, and why, maybe. As long as I can take the heat first. Because really, it is really weird.
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Test, test, is this thing on?
Hi Everyone,
So this has been the weirdest week I could have ever imagined.
Sunday-Decided to come home to take care of this liver thing, I think I mentioned it before.
Monday-Was on a plane home.
Monday (California time)-Doctor's visits galore.
Tuesday-Thursday-On the phone with the doctors office.
Friday-TBD
Hopefully I can get in with the Liver specialist tomorrow, considering all the time we spent complaining on the customer service line. Best case scenario they will tell me that I am fine, and that I can just resume business as usual. That outcome seems almost anticlimactic, given the circumstances, but I would certainly be most happy with that, of course. This is still too surreal to like, reflect properly on though, so I will just leave it to your imagination.
Besides that, being on the airplane not even 12 hours after my tickets were booked was crazy. It was like I might as well have take a ride in a spaceship or a time machine or something. Suddenly I was worlds away from where I was just a few hours ago. I packed light, got my passport stamped, and got on my way. Shayn took me to the airport bus, which was such a good way to start my journey. Overall things went well, and are going well, but I just want to get back to my program. I feel like I just suddenly had to leave all of my work and all of my friends behind on no notice at all. I am sad. To say the very least. Being home and seeing my family is wonderful, but such bad timing. I'm just trying to trust in what the universe brings, that these are all good things that are happening. It's hard on me. But what can I do? Just relax, stay calm, enjoy, work hard, keep moving forward... I'm trying my best here. Wish me luck people.
So this has been the weirdest week I could have ever imagined.
Sunday-Decided to come home to take care of this liver thing, I think I mentioned it before.
Monday-Was on a plane home.
Monday (California time)-Doctor's visits galore.
Tuesday-Thursday-On the phone with the doctors office.
Friday-TBD
Hopefully I can get in with the Liver specialist tomorrow, considering all the time we spent complaining on the customer service line. Best case scenario they will tell me that I am fine, and that I can just resume business as usual. That outcome seems almost anticlimactic, given the circumstances, but I would certainly be most happy with that, of course. This is still too surreal to like, reflect properly on though, so I will just leave it to your imagination.
Besides that, being on the airplane not even 12 hours after my tickets were booked was crazy. It was like I might as well have take a ride in a spaceship or a time machine or something. Suddenly I was worlds away from where I was just a few hours ago. I packed light, got my passport stamped, and got on my way. Shayn took me to the airport bus, which was such a good way to start my journey. Overall things went well, and are going well, but I just want to get back to my program. I feel like I just suddenly had to leave all of my work and all of my friends behind on no notice at all. I am sad. To say the very least. Being home and seeing my family is wonderful, but such bad timing. I'm just trying to trust in what the universe brings, that these are all good things that are happening. It's hard on me. But what can I do? Just relax, stay calm, enjoy, work hard, keep moving forward... I'm trying my best here. Wish me luck people.
Thursday, November 28, 2013
Thanksgiving in China, or Life is a Crisp Apple
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Wishing so bad that I was back in the states eating turkey and stuffing with everyone right now. Boy, I do love Thanksgiving. Usually, at some point during the meal, I get to mention what I am thankful for, but since I have no turkey dinner, I will just mention it here! But before I do that, let me tell you a funny story.
On Thanksgiving day, China time, I went to class, and took a test, and then came back starving, and like wolfed down a whole bowl of hot clay bowl mixed rice in like five minutes flat. I didn't even think about it being Thanksgiving for like even a second while I ate dinner! Later while talking to a friend, she asked me what I was going to do for Thanksgiving dinner, and it dawned on me that I have just zoomed right on through it! It was so odd, do think that I had actually forgotten to celebrate Thanksgiving.
Anyways, despite the fact that I am a horrible person for forgetting thanksgiving, I was able to talk to my whole family that morning, which was such a treat. They called me on Skype, and I got to say hi to my mom and dad, sister, uncle, grandpa, and great-aunt. Very cool.
And now, I'd like to take a second to share all the things that I am thankful for. So many things, where do I start?
My family! How lucky I am am to have such an amazing group of people that I get to share my life with! How lucky I am that my parents love and support me enough to put me through school and let me go halfway around the world, and who help me navigate all sorts of stupid problems that I get myself into. Check bounces in a foreign country--call Dad. How to make pie dough--call Mom. Feeling tired and/or confused, don't know what to do, and need a pep talk--call my parents. For times to marvel in wonder at the universe--call my sister. Haha, it makes me sound like a baby, but I just really love my family, and I feel so blessed by them.
I feel grateful for the getting the opportunity to study and get an education, especially here in Nanjing. This experience has been absolutely 100% positive, empowering, eye-opening, fun, and challenging. I feel like my Chinese is improving, I am making wonderful friends and connections, and that I am getting to know a part of myself. Its as if this world is my home, and I am simply getting to know areas of my home that I have had yet to explore. I cannot express how important a role education has played in shaping me as a person, and is such a gift.
I am grateful for my healthy body. I wake up in the morning happy, pain free, fully abled. My body lets me walk to the bus station, lets me read and write papers far later into the night than is reasonable, lets me stay up late and have fun, and still doesn't keel over. I did recently discover that I have a cyst in my liver which I am being urged to handle as swiftly as possible, but oddly enough, these days I feel better than ever, and I feel like this cyst thing is just unimportant in light of all the good things that I have going for me. Maybe not the most practical though, but hey, I'm just saying.
I am thankful for my sweetest, nicest boyfriend, Will, who is working his butt off in SF, doing all manner of jobs, and films, and acting companies. I just couldn't be any happier for you baby. I am grateful that you are doing so well. I am grateful you haven't keeled over yet from all of your 18hr work days!
In short, I am grateful to be alive, to feel the cold air on my face in the morning, to get tongue-tied speaking bad Chinese, to dance Zumba class with all the onlookers looking-on, to drag my ass out of bed every morning and to the office, to eat delicious delicious chinese breakfast burrito that may or may not be cooked all the way. This life just couldn't be any more delicious, like biting into a cool crisp apple and crunching it all up with juice running down your fingers. I say, so what if it's getting a little sticky, to hell with it all, because this apple is just so delicious! And this apple is my life. So thanks Mom and Dad for having me, thanks SF State for teaching me, thanks to China for taking me in, thanks to my friends for loving me, and thanks to the universe for letting me exist here, right now.
Love, Rachel.
On Thanksgiving day, China time, I went to class, and took a test, and then came back starving, and like wolfed down a whole bowl of hot clay bowl mixed rice in like five minutes flat. I didn't even think about it being Thanksgiving for like even a second while I ate dinner! Later while talking to a friend, she asked me what I was going to do for Thanksgiving dinner, and it dawned on me that I have just zoomed right on through it! It was so odd, do think that I had actually forgotten to celebrate Thanksgiving.
Anyways, despite the fact that I am a horrible person for forgetting thanksgiving, I was able to talk to my whole family that morning, which was such a treat. They called me on Skype, and I got to say hi to my mom and dad, sister, uncle, grandpa, and great-aunt. Very cool.
And now, I'd like to take a second to share all the things that I am thankful for. So many things, where do I start?
My family! How lucky I am am to have such an amazing group of people that I get to share my life with! How lucky I am that my parents love and support me enough to put me through school and let me go halfway around the world, and who help me navigate all sorts of stupid problems that I get myself into. Check bounces in a foreign country--call Dad. How to make pie dough--call Mom. Feeling tired and/or confused, don't know what to do, and need a pep talk--call my parents. For times to marvel in wonder at the universe--call my sister. Haha, it makes me sound like a baby, but I just really love my family, and I feel so blessed by them.
I feel grateful for the getting the opportunity to study and get an education, especially here in Nanjing. This experience has been absolutely 100% positive, empowering, eye-opening, fun, and challenging. I feel like my Chinese is improving, I am making wonderful friends and connections, and that I am getting to know a part of myself. Its as if this world is my home, and I am simply getting to know areas of my home that I have had yet to explore. I cannot express how important a role education has played in shaping me as a person, and is such a gift.
I am grateful for my healthy body. I wake up in the morning happy, pain free, fully abled. My body lets me walk to the bus station, lets me read and write papers far later into the night than is reasonable, lets me stay up late and have fun, and still doesn't keel over. I did recently discover that I have a cyst in my liver which I am being urged to handle as swiftly as possible, but oddly enough, these days I feel better than ever, and I feel like this cyst thing is just unimportant in light of all the good things that I have going for me. Maybe not the most practical though, but hey, I'm just saying.
I am thankful for my sweetest, nicest boyfriend, Will, who is working his butt off in SF, doing all manner of jobs, and films, and acting companies. I just couldn't be any happier for you baby. I am grateful that you are doing so well. I am grateful you haven't keeled over yet from all of your 18hr work days!
In short, I am grateful to be alive, to feel the cold air on my face in the morning, to get tongue-tied speaking bad Chinese, to dance Zumba class with all the onlookers looking-on, to drag my ass out of bed every morning and to the office, to eat delicious delicious chinese breakfast burrito that may or may not be cooked all the way. This life just couldn't be any more delicious, like biting into a cool crisp apple and crunching it all up with juice running down your fingers. I say, so what if it's getting a little sticky, to hell with it all, because this apple is just so delicious! And this apple is my life. So thanks Mom and Dad for having me, thanks SF State for teaching me, thanks to China for taking me in, thanks to my friends for loving me, and thanks to the universe for letting me exist here, right now.
Love, Rachel.
Friday, November 22, 2013
SO, FUNNY STORY
So, if you read my last post, you probably noticed I was in a bit of a tizzy--I had just been really working hard on this paper, and it was sort of getting to me that night.
But so then later I had one of those you're-doing-it-wrong epiphanies. So get this.
I was like complaining to my friend Ben about how long my paper is, wah, whoa is me, this sort of thing. By that time I had written about 4 pages, and the word count was only at like 2100 words. So I relate this to Ben, saying that if I go on like this, this paper is going to be like 6 pages long, but then he looks at me and says, no way. He was writing a paper at this time as well, and says he's on page two and has 2000 characters--there was clearly something not matching up.
He goes, "Wait, are you using word count or character count?"
Me: [mind gets blown] "I'm sorry, what?" There is a difference?
Yes folks, there is a real big difference, to the tune of like 4500 actual characters, as compared to 2100 "words."
So I'll explain a little bit. The essay is in Chinese, and the "character count" is 3000. But I was just going off the "word count" that is listed at the bottom of the page in my word processor. I thought that this would be fine to use, because in Chinese each character is its own word. But then two words next to each other can have a new meaning, almost like a new word. We suspect that somehow the program, Pages, was actually counting character phrases, which literally chops the actual word count in half.
So this was the day before the paper was due, and here I was thinking that I had such a long way to go, when in reality I had written far more that was actually necessary. I'm sure that you can imagine, I was so surprised and happy. It was such a relief.
The other funny thing is though, that I have been going off of this "word count" for my entire career in college. So all of the assignments that I have ever written have literally been twice as long as they were supposed to. Surprise! All the time I could have spent....
For all of you unsuspecting Chinese students though, for all that is good in the world, use character count, and save yourself the trouble! Anyways, that was a funny moment this week, thought I would share. Love, R.
But so then later I had one of those you're-doing-it-wrong epiphanies. So get this.
I was like complaining to my friend Ben about how long my paper is, wah, whoa is me, this sort of thing. By that time I had written about 4 pages, and the word count was only at like 2100 words. So I relate this to Ben, saying that if I go on like this, this paper is going to be like 6 pages long, but then he looks at me and says, no way. He was writing a paper at this time as well, and says he's on page two and has 2000 characters--there was clearly something not matching up.
He goes, "Wait, are you using word count or character count?"
Me: [mind gets blown] "I'm sorry, what?" There is a difference?
Yes folks, there is a real big difference, to the tune of like 4500 actual characters, as compared to 2100 "words."
So I'll explain a little bit. The essay is in Chinese, and the "character count" is 3000. But I was just going off the "word count" that is listed at the bottom of the page in my word processor. I thought that this would be fine to use, because in Chinese each character is its own word. But then two words next to each other can have a new meaning, almost like a new word. We suspect that somehow the program, Pages, was actually counting character phrases, which literally chops the actual word count in half.
So this was the day before the paper was due, and here I was thinking that I had such a long way to go, when in reality I had written far more that was actually necessary. I'm sure that you can imagine, I was so surprised and happy. It was such a relief.
The other funny thing is though, that I have been going off of this "word count" for my entire career in college. So all of the assignments that I have ever written have literally been twice as long as they were supposed to. Surprise! All the time I could have spent....
For all of you unsuspecting Chinese students though, for all that is good in the world, use character count, and save yourself the trouble! Anyways, that was a funny moment this week, thought I would share. Love, R.
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
A little tiny update, HSK Scores
Hi Everyone!
I've been sitting in this office all day long, feverishly writing this paper, the longest paper I've ever written in the shortest time I've ever been given in a foreign language... And I'm like not kidding about the feverish part, it's all this hot tea and lack of movement, it turns my face all red and hot... GOOD TIMES.
Anyways taking a break from all that to share my good news... I passed the HSK 6! This is exciting news, I didn't think that I would pass! HSK, 汉语水平考试, hanyu shuiping kaoshi, "hsk," is the standard test of Chinese language, 6 being the highest level. The test covers reading, writing and listening. Surprisingly, I did the best in writing, which is kind of cool I think, because I like writing.
I only passed by 6 points, which is to say my score was just above 60%, haha. Among Chinese college students, there is a saying 百分之70万岁, "Long live the 70th percentile," referring to the relaxed standards of passing college tests. In our case, we can say long live the 60th percentile, even better! Haha.
Its kind of a weight off of my shoulders, because from what I gather through the poorly communicated rules of this program, we are "required" to pass level 6 of this test at some point, or something. There will be a second test in the spring that we will take, but since I already got level 6, there will be somewhat less pressure for me to test well down the road.
Having a little personal celebration! Thought I would share with you guys! Wahoo!
I've been sitting in this office all day long, feverishly writing this paper, the longest paper I've ever written in the shortest time I've ever been given in a foreign language... And I'm like not kidding about the feverish part, it's all this hot tea and lack of movement, it turns my face all red and hot... GOOD TIMES.
Anyways taking a break from all that to share my good news... I passed the HSK 6! This is exciting news, I didn't think that I would pass! HSK, 汉语水平考试, hanyu shuiping kaoshi, "hsk," is the standard test of Chinese language, 6 being the highest level. The test covers reading, writing and listening. Surprisingly, I did the best in writing, which is kind of cool I think, because I like writing.
I only passed by 6 points, which is to say my score was just above 60%, haha. Among Chinese college students, there is a saying 百分之70万岁, "Long live the 70th percentile," referring to the relaxed standards of passing college tests. In our case, we can say long live the 60th percentile, even better! Haha.
Its kind of a weight off of my shoulders, because from what I gather through the poorly communicated rules of this program, we are "required" to pass level 6 of this test at some point, or something. There will be a second test in the spring that we will take, but since I already got level 6, there will be somewhat less pressure for me to test well down the road.
Having a little personal celebration! Thought I would share with you guys! Wahoo!
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